Welcome to my homepage. I am curious to decide how I use this to express myself. It seems I never have enough constraints on my own web page to be able to create anything. So to address that, I will begin to propose some arbitrary constraints to this page.
The struggle to self-express is renewed and redouled within me.
My complaint is that for years, decades even, I have come back to working on my home page, or rather re-started such a project again and again. And I never get past this stage. I don't need to complain so much. I think this can work. I'm not put off by what I've done so far. I can build on this. :)
Up to date as of September 9, 2024
For the Jolog or Jojo-blog I would like to use it to display directories with a 'personal ad' box for each md file in the directory.
I have been staring into the abyss lately, and you know what they say: when you stare into the abyss, the abyss gets a little defensive and stares back, and then it's awkward so you both look away at the same time, but then you try to sneak a peak while it's not looking just at it does the same thing and then you both start giggling and you become friends for life, ride or die girl pals till oblivion! You know.
But anyways something is coming out of all this...
In this thread I will live toot the revelation! I will lie to you. I will reveal the mysteries and obscure the obvious. By the end of it I won't trust anything I think I know. And you won't trust me. But you may follow where I pretend to lead. I drink the tears of Cassandra. I juggle the balls (eyes and otherwise) of Tiresias. Let she who has ears to hear, cover them up and read my lips. ... Something is coming. Hold the phones.
Patience my loves.
One night in the best future my secret sister and I were swimming naked in the fiery sea. I was caught in an icy current and carried offshore. I wondered at the time if my life had ever even happened. But I washed up on a shiny strand with iridescence glinting in the surf. Water filtering through the sand let a message crystallize upon the virgin shelf. I dared not step out of the water in case I confused the secret language printed on the sand. But then I saw a squirrel on a beach chair...
... And careless of consequence I crushed the ancient wisdom beneath my bare feet and crossed the bar to kneel before the little chittering squirrel.
DJECIBL! it said to me, calling out my name in its squirrelly voice.
YOU HAVE OBLITERATED THE GREAT AND SECRET MESSAGE FROM YOUR GODDESS WITH YOUR WET AND SALTY FEET.
I'm sorry, I said. Are you mad?
NOT REALLY...
Don't sweat it. I looked at it just before you wrecked it. I'll tell you what
I think it said. Listen up buttercup...
And so it told to me the things I'm about to tell you. The words and thoughts of Eris Our Lady Of #Discordia, our Sister in Strife, our Mother in Mayhem, elder Crone of Confusion long may she dismay.
What follows here is the true and false testimony of her faithless follower, mome mysterious and profitless prophetess, Djecibel Aester, as accurately as could be conveyed by the absent minded mutterings of an inattentive tree rodent.
...Okay let me think. It was right on the tip of my tongue.
The squirrely oracle taught me the Thetis doctrine. For years, discordions have erroneously believed the heresy of #malaclypse. But Thetis herself reached out of her watery abode with her divine finger to write the truth in a text in the sand. This is what (the squirrel says) she said:
Thetis: Okay first of all, she was never ducking *not invited*. She was absolutely totally invited. I invited her myself. She simply wasn't on the guest list because my stupid fucking fiancee, and his god-awful Greek god friends crossed her name off of it! Put to rest any idea that she came to ruin my wedding on account of being snubbed. No. She came to my wedding because I wanted her. Because I knew if she came, she'd fuck it up beyond all recognition! She's turn it to total fucking frog shit.
And my baby girl didn't disappoint. Damn. Eris's love's never failed me yet. And she won't fail you. That's why I'm telling you this. If you're going to go on worshiping this bitch you deserve to know the truth. You don't deserve her. Nobody does. But you deserve to know just what the fuck you are getting into. (What you got into actually, because honey there's no getting out now) You're in trouble. Her name means Strife. Look it up! She's not here to make your life easy, or make you feel good.
Back to my story. She didn't ruin my wedding out of malice. (Eris is the least malicious goddess you'll ever meet.) She didn't even mean to ruin it. No she came to my wedding for love. My love. Her love. And that's the only love there was between any two beings at that dumpster fire of a divine wedding. That's why they didn't want her there. That's the part they leave out of all the stories. (You won't find this shit on Wikipedia!) Sure they admit I wasn't exactly a willing wedding participant.
So you can read whatever you want about why I was being offered up like some fucking sacrificial pig to Peleus. I literally do not care. Like AT ALL. It doesn't even affect the way I fart, (as they say on another island). But what I did care about, was having my own fucking actual girlfriend at my fucking wedding. So I begged her to come and she said of course I love you I'll be there. What do you want for your present? And I said I don't care that she could give me an apple for all it mattered.
You can also read (on Wikipedia because I'm so done with their bullshit) about how I never even got the apple but later an even bigger asshole than my husband gave MY apple (my wedding gift) to the biggest cunt (cough #Aphrodite cough cough ) on Olympus before he murdered my only child #paris #trojanwar
But I'm not here to tell my story. This is about #Eris my true love. Stick around and I'll get around to telling you the rest.